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My Stuff My Fics & Art My Anime Fav Places Fics & Art Webcomics Manga Anime Voice Actors Japanese Archives 04 Jan-12 Apr 2011 For older entries, you can work your way through my past hosts, but I moved because of problems, so by rights they should all be dead anyway! :P IftI on Portland.co.uk But against all reason, the really old entries on Pitas are all still here... 23 Oct 2003
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Thursday, November 10, 2011 It hasn't arrived early. It better arrive on time! I may get up early tomorrow and lurk in the sun lounge with my laptop so I can watch the front door. Just one more day... IGN did their review of Skyrim, and from the sounds of it, it's exactly what I've been expecting. A UI that is a pain to use with a mouse and keyboard (I fear it might force me to use my scroll wheel which doesn't work properly...) but worth putting up with for the immensity of the world it presents you with. I just hope my graphics card can cope with it since I saw somewhere that my card was listed as the minimum it will run on. It was the same for the Witcher 2 but I could play that on high detail because my quad core and 8GB of RAM clearly picked up the slack. Here's hoping Skyrim will run similarly. And here's hoping someone will make a mod quickly to improve that UI. Apparently you can't even use numbers as quick keys. Hmmm... My one big worry about the game was justified, but I shall need to wait to see just how annoying that is going to be... Just one more day... Xilmin visited the elves at 03:43 p.m. Wednesday, November 9, 2011 I want Skyrim so bad I feel like my head is about to explode. AAAHHHHHH!!! But even if it does arrive early, according to others on the net who have got it they can't play it because it needs to be activated via Steam. I'm playing Lord of the Rings Online again instead of Oblivion in the mean time. It's less of a reminder of what I'm not playing and somehow I spend hours doing the most meaningless things. Time flies when my brain has shut down. Just let me play that for another day and a half and then it should be here. It BETTER be here! And the post man better not do what he's been doing these past few months and not bothering ringing the doorbell. If I have to wait an additional 24 hours before I can get it from the post office I will go insane! And I will sound like this. I adore that cat. And just before I go, while I'm linking youtube videos, here's an Oblivion one. I can't stop watching it, and singing along. The Silly Adventures of Mr Mochi. Anyway back to Lord of the Rings Online. Xilmin visited the elves at 07:51 p.m. Tuesday, November 8, 2011 Such a cruel morning... The doorbell rings, I LEAP out of bed, thinking "It's Thursday! It's here! Skyrim is here!" and desperately rummage through the clothes on the floor to find my dressing gown so I can answer the door... Only I hear my mum answer it and greet a friend. Such disappointment. I look at my phone: Tuesday. Damn it! Not only is it another 2 days away, but I had to work for my dad today. Ugh. 5 hours where I did next to nothing. Stared blankly at the screen waiting on things and got into a couple of pointless arguments with my dad. One of those was on the nature of gravity. How did that even come up? Bah. Also argued about jobs just being jobs versus jobs as a means to promotion and advancement. I guess I just have no ambition, proven by my lack of interest in getting a job in the first place I suppose. Anyway dinner is going to ready soon. I just wanted to mention the morning... so cruel. Such excitement to be instantly vapourised into nothingness. Skyrim really is the only thing I'm excited for right now. Want it NOW! As if I haven't said that enough already... And now I think about it I don't even know why I've been thinking it will arrive on Thursday. The 11th is a Friday... Even more disappointment. Though it was shipped on Saturday so I can still hope it will arrive early... Xilmin visited the elves at 06:48 p.m. Sunday, November 6, 2011 My mum has broken her wrist cycling... You know what, I'm not going to rant about that... Just not... It makes me sound like I'm accusing her of doing it on purpose. But my dad gets to escape to Aberdeen later this week. I know he's been getting annoyed too (just from tone and subtle comments). Lucky. In better news Game has apparently already shipped my preorder of Skyrim. Is it just going to sit in a warehouse for the next few days or is it going to arrive early? Where is it? I want to know! So for the time being I'm back to playing Oblivion. Completed the Knights of the Nine story line, which was actually rather short, but interesting enough I guess. Some nice equipment though. Now I'm in the Shivering Isles, the realm of the Mad God Sheogorath. He is awesome... except when the Irish (with a hint of Scottish) accent drops and you hear it is the same guy who voices every Imperial in the world. Though I think I'm enjoying his... manservant?... Haskill even more. He appears to loathe everyone and everything but is ever so polite with a large helping of sarcasm. Hopefully there will be enough quests to keep me occupied over the next few days before Skyrim arrives. Xilmin visited the elves at 03:58 p.m. Tuesday, November 1, 2011 Well, today was my birthday... But I never really felt like it. Did I do something different today? Sure. Was it time well spent? ... uh... no. I mended jeans. Well I guess technically that is more constructive than what I usually do but it's not exactly entertaining. It's something I've been meaning to do for the last 10 months. Why 10 months? Because last christmas I got new jeans and I've been wearing those same jeans without washing them for those 10 months as I didn't have any other jeans without holes in them. Only took them off because I got them covered in paint after repainting the front door (parents have had the outside of the front extension redone and the door no longer matched). Got jeans for a present today too and that resulted in me patching my current pairs to stop my mum chucking them out. So it was a fun day... Sure I did some other stuff. Checked into a couple of Lord of the Rings Online characters. I've won various seasonal lotteries on all but 1 of my 10 characters now, so I'm having to log in to get the mail or it will disappear in 2 weeks. Still got another 2 I need to check on that I haven't logged into in about 2 months, but because the kin is so close and everyone knows everyone, I feel I can't just sneak in, check my mail and leave again. I don't want to have to have to explain my reasons for not wanting to play extensively. Even just pretending to be civil and asking how everyone has been seems like too much hard work. ::sigh:: But I might have won some points which can be put towards getting the Moria expansion, so I can't not log in. Or... I might have just won a couple lumps of coal. Trick or treat indeed. But I think more than anything the reason I don't feel like today was my birthday is because my real present to myself isn't released until the 11th. Still haven't preordered Skyrim yet as I don't actually have enough money in my current account (for the collector's edition that is), but once I put my cheque in the bank tomorrow I can finally get on with that. God I really want that game so bad it's ridiculous! Listening to the theme repeatedly at the moment. Why can't I have it yet? I WANT IT NOW! I just wish I could live in isolation while I played it, store food in my room and block the door. I do not want to be disturbed! Just over 1 week now... I can cope... Somehow... Xilmin visited the elves at 12:59 p.m. Monday, October 24, 2011 4 nights in a row, 4 nightmares. Thanks subconscious. You've definitely compensated for the nice dream, you can STOP now. They're just getting worse though, that's the problem. First two were just jump awake dreams. Waking up with a heart attack isn't exactly pleasant but it's easy to get back to sleep afterwards. Third one was more subtle. My mum has some mental disease where she couldn't even go to the bathroom on her own. As disturbing as that is, it was the stupid smile on her face the entire time that was truly creepy, I just wanted to run away. Last night was terrifying. I think I was supposed to be in some kind of horror game (though in the game such that it was actually reality if I knew it wasn't real). I had just used a room as some sort of transporter, and could hear on the other side of the door something breathing. I go into crouch mode and wield my lead pipe or whatever I was carrying. I go to open the door and sneak attack... only the thing opens the door itself and comes at me. I flail wildly with the pipe, pushing it down the corridor and into cupboard where I kill it... Only to have to kill a possessed mop as well... I step back... and then it gets a bit weird. I knew I was dreaming at that point, and I guess it was something of a self-fulfilling prophecy to then think about how my subconscious likes to scare me. Down the corridor comes this ghost, only not just a transparent person type ghost, but one that's rotted, skin hanging off bones, and yet insubstantial so my pipe did no good against it. Only now I know I'm in bed, and I'm trying to kick it since it is looming over me. I'm desperately trying to sit up and open my eyes but it took too long to actually manage it that it was almost on top of me... Had to put the light on and listen to music for a while to help me get back to sleep since I was terrified of shadows, never mind the sound of my parents sleeping sounded too like the ghost breathing. I'm praying for a peaceful night tonight... In more amusing news, I've been playing Lord of the Rings Online again. It took 10 characters but I've finally made a character based a little on myself. Not named her Xilmin... Instead she is Saelwien. Sounds a bit like it, but fits the Elven naming form. She's a version of me, but not me. I've grown rather attached now, even although she's only level 15 and she isn't the first champion I've made. Was looking forward to getting all the titles for not dying up to level 20... Only last night I had that ruined by some mental guy in the crafting hall in Bree. Most people spend their time crafting going afk or chatting or generally not paying attention. I wasn't paying attention... only then I noticed someone just died. What? Then a giant bog-lurker shows up off to the side of my screen and attacks someone next to me. I'm confused and can't work out what is going on, thinking maybe the person did something that caused the thing to appear and get revenge or something. Only then it attacks more people and I get hit my an area of effect attack. Only then do I realise I'm in trouble. The thing is max level 75! I try to run for the door only to discover I'm rooted in place. The thing is busy focusing on someone else so I'm still hoping I can get out of there. I'm finally released and head for the door... I don't even get half way... One swipe and I collapse to the floor. Goodbye Undying title. ::pout:: I refuse to revive since I know the thing will just kill me a second time and force me to retreat which I don't want to do because I'm curious what is going to happen. I watch people come in and fight it... and die. It took a group of people to take it town a few minutes later. Thankfully one of those people revived me so I got to watch the whole battle. I cheered. Victory! I ask where it came from and make some comment about losing my chance at the title. A guy sends me a tell saying sorry he didn't think of that. I wanted to be angry. Should have looked around the room for him so I could at least emote a slap at him. But truly I wasn't that angry because the experience was so unexpected and interesting. Livened an otherwise rather dull activity quite successfully. I'm just confused how he was capable of summoning something that was actively aggressive to other players. Didn't think that was possible... Oh well, was entertaining anyway. Xilmin visited the elves at 12:46 p.m. Thursday, October 20, 2011 I had the most wonderful dream last night, especially considering my... state last night. Parents are away until Saturday, leaving me with my paranoia. I got stuck in the bathroom last night for 20 minutes or maybe longer because I was too terrified to open the door. The dream was just what I needed, to feel safe and secure and protected. And to be able to express my affection for someone my way. I keep laughing remember whacking the guy in the face. Such intimacy from me, so rare! XD I don't even know what he was saying, I just enjoyed the opportunity to hit him. Don't misunderstand, that's as much physical contact as there was, which was just perfect. The point was I felt safe. Of course I wasn't exactly me, and whoever I was was completely insane. I don't even know if I was actually capable of speech, or speaking anything other than gibberish. I think someone accused me of taking drugs at one point. Don't really remember much else. Just the whack! It makes me smile. Surprising dream considering my subconscious normally likes to torment me, dreams of the dog filling me with guilt and everything lately involving water which freaks me out enough without whatever else the dream involves. Waking up with a smile on my face (and being able to keep getting the smile back whenever I remember) makes a very nice change... Whack :D Xilmin visited the elves at 1:13 p.m. Wednesday, October 12, 2011 Why isn't Skyrim out yet? I want it NOOOOWWWWWW!!!! One more month... One more month... Too long to wait... :( I'm just hoping that when the inevitable "what do you want for your birthday?" question comes from my parents that they will accept preordering the collector's edition. Considering last time they refused to endorse my gaming obsession I'm not entirely hopeful... But my dad has now officially employed me (mostly just tidying and doing a little helping with his accounts), so technically I could just spend almost my entire month's wage on one game... I want it damn it, just for the awesome statue really. It's going against my normal principle that preordering is a waste of time if I don't get extra content. The game still remains the same, but the statue (and map and making-of stuff) is apparently worth about £100. :S I just want the game so much that I can't NOT preorder it, and getting the extras would make the early purchase feel more worthwhile rather than the normal bland box it would come in. ::sigh:: Want it NOW though... :( To continue what I was babbling about last time I bothered to blog, I've now completed the main quest of Oblivion (well except for getting the reward armour which takes several game-days). Was pretty awesome... but far too many babysitting moments (aka escort missions). Glad I'd lowered the difficulty (though I had increased it slightly from last time I blogged, but not back to the default). I also became the grandmaster of all the guilds (before I even moved on to the main quest). The Mages Guild was rather anticlimactic I thought, but the others had some interesting developments, especially the Dark Brotherhood. Still got the expansions to do though, but I needed a break from the game. Played it a bit too much I think. Really want to explore the Shivering Isles though. I briefly wandering in there, got through the introductory bit, followed the northern road to the capital, talked to everyone then took the southern road back to the portal out. I got ridiculously excited about the place just because it is quirky. But instead of feeling the like the realm of the 'Mad God', it just feels like Morrowind! Giant mushrooms, weird creatures... Oblivion feels too traditionally fantasy-esque. Shivering Isles had a more interesting vibe from my brief exploration of it. Got a feeling I won't get around to that before Skyrim comes out though. One more month... Lately however I've been playing something entirely different. An indie puzzle game called SpaceChem. Some real chemistry is mixed into there, but it's just ridiculously complex. I like it so much just because every level has so many methods of completion, limited only by your imagination. My levels tend to work out ridiculously complex, perhaps because I only have a rough idea of what I want, then try to pull it together bit by bit without much planning. I'm usually amazed I actually get things to work. It has options to record videos of your solutions so I've put some up on Youtube (Every Day is the First Day and No Ordinary Headache). I've got more on my computer I haven't uploaded yet. Had to give up part way through a level this evening because I just wasn't getting anywhere. Since every night while I sleep for the past week I've been contemplating techniques of increasing efficiency and such, so maybe tomorrow I'll have figured out a solution to it. It's definitely possible. It's just figuring out how to organise the thing and not run out of space for commands. Part of me though just wants to complete it for the story that you can read between every other level. I want to know what happens! Which means tearing my hair out for another couple of worlds as things get even more complex... Any other news? Nope. Still spending as much time as possible on my own in the room. Bliss. Xilmin visited the elves at 11:34 p.m. Thursday, August 25, 2011 Hello world. Been a while. I'm just here because I had an epic and freaky dream that I want to write down. So... It was supposed to be the first ever apocalyptic sci-fi movie ever made: Skyway. Either made it 1917 and set in 1942, or set in 1917 but made in 1942. Anyway, it started out in black and white. The Skyway was a massive road junction that not only had roads going in 3 directions on the ground but also one going directly upwards. Don't know where that was supposed to go since all the 'camera shots' pointed downwards. It had been built using technology left over by aliens who had long ago disappeared. Only now they were back... and angry apparently. Destruction and death followed. The main character of this movie was special somehow though. An alien sliced his throat open but it didn't bleed. When the alien turned its back, his neck healed itself and he killed the alien. Cut to him running through the traffic, cars flying overhead, explosions and fire. He finds tanks sent in by the government. He yells his name as he's a scientist who knows about these aliens and they would be looking for him. One of the tank commanders points him to a car that will take him to their headquarters. He has to jump in the car as it's moving, heading straight into a wall (literally). He closes the door but the other people in the car panic saying the door isn't shut properly. The car is entirely inside the wall now, everything is pitch black outside. Bubbling can be heard around their feet as if something is seeping into the car. He opens and closes the door again (with no resistance to anything outside, as if they are surrounded by nothing), but again it's not shut right and the bubbling continues. One more go with opening the door wider and slamming it shut seals the car and the bubbling stops. They come to the end of the journey. Light comes through the wall ahead of them, but the car stops just after the bonnet has gone through the wall. A message pops up in the car saying that the 'magic' has run out. I don't know how they got out of there, as it then cut to an overview of the skyway again, everything breaking down, cars falling from the vertical road, lights going out all around, etc. Next thing I remember he is in their headquarters carrying around his notes with him since he is paranoid someone will steal them, thinking there is a traitor somewhere. Others start doing similarly. They have diagrams that they have drawn based on what the aliens have left behind, of their technology and of the aliens themselves. Though they had trouble with the scale in some cases, one of the aliens they worked out to be the size of a skyscraper that floated above ground, but could still house people inside it. They have one of the smaller alien types in a cage. It is child-sized, but it is pitch black so you can't define the shape of it as you can't see any shadows on it. You can see it's the whites of it's human like eyes around a red iris. And you can definitely see it's wide mouth filled with sharp teeth, similar to a piranha. This alien suddenly starts screaming and shaking the bars of it's cage. And then everywhere these aliens suddenly appear, as if they had always been there but now decided to show themselves. They unwrap themselves from tree branches. Even a couple lying on a settee watching a movie suddenly find there are 2 of these things with them. I woke around then... and I could probably have gone back to sleep again... if I hadn't been wearing my sleep mask (I'd already been woken by the door bell at a ridiculous hour so put my sleep mask on to get me back to sleep despite the sunlight coming through the curtains). I wake up and all I see is black... and I think one of the aliens has it's hands over my eyes... jzsdh;bvoahiod;fnhagjkopfauih... Yeah didn't get back to sleep after that. I suppose I should say something else while I'm here... I completed the main quest of Morrowind! Yup, that's what I care about! The final battle was even a bit of a struggle even with my level 46 character that could kill almost every enemy in Morrowind with 1-3 hits. Mostly just because I wasn't entirely sure what I should be doing. Do I hit this thing now or that thing now, with this or with that? Epic without question though! Still have other quests to do mind you. Got to do more temple quests while I wait for my Redoran stronghold to be built. And I have a number of quests to finish on Solstheim too, and pretty much everything in Mournhold since I've barely done anything there. Never mind that I made a new character as well, a 'spellsword' (my main is an archer) since I added some mods to have regenerating magicka and quick casting like in Oblivion to make a mage character more reasonable. That's about the only thing I think Oblivion improved on Morrowind. Morrowind is without question one of my favourite games of all time, fighting for top place with Dragon Age Origins (I'll ignore the sequel since the more I think about it the more I hate it. Tried to mod that into something more like Origins but it just wasn't possible). Now I'm mostly focussed on playing Oblivion though. I really do want to try and complete the main quest before Skyrim comes out. I know it doesn't really make a difference, but I'd just feel better if I know more about the Oblivion plot line. Got a long way to go since I started yet another character, trying to get something that works with my playing style and Oblivion's ridiculous levelling system. After trying (and failing) to protect a couple of guys from goblins I finally relented and decreased the difficulty by 10%. Everything since then has been a breeze but we'll see what happens when I reach level 5 and trolls start cropping up in the woods. That's usually the point I rage quit since I can't hit enough and keep myself healed while they regenerate and have to leg it back to the nearest town to get a guard to help me kill it. I'm still doing a lot of stealth and archery especially when dungeon delving, but I specifically chose a class that has as many melee skills as possible. No more levelling based on stealth and marksman and then finding I can't handle a proper fight. This way I level slowly but know that I'm levelling based on the best skills for survival. I'm just praying Skyrim has a much better system... and more voice actors! Morrowind may have required reading text but least it didn't constantly break the illusion of a real world. You talk to a beggar with an 'old woman' voice, then you ask for rumours and suddenly she sounds posh. Though my wanting more realism is limited since I hate having to wait around for shops to open and the like. Hanging around the mages guild because the person who sells the spell you want has decided to go for lunch and isn't offering his services. ARGH! But I've now modded Oblivion out fairly extensively too. Better textures, better nature/weather systems, some unofficial bug patches but especially the most important mod of all, a redesigning of the user interface. Blasted evil consolitis infected the original interface so everything was needlessly massive. Now all the text is smaller and things like the skills screen don't even need scrolling any more. DarNified UI - highly recommended. Enough ranting about games. I'm going to go play some. Don't talk to me about real life though. Not interested. :p Xilmin visited the elves at 1:00 p.m. Sunday, July 3, 2011 Just archiving and clearing those previous entries from the main page. Let's just pretend I didn't write those, eh? I feel fine... avoiding most human contact, sure, but that's fine as far as I'm concerned. Mostly just been playing Lord of the Rings Online which I consider to be social interaction. I have 7 characters now, over 4 servers... That's probably some kind of MMO schizophrenia. ;) But now Steam have got their summer sale on, so I've been dragged out of the woodwork to at least join the Steam community a little with the promise of cheap games (bought 3 already) and the possibility of free ones. Meh, got nothing else to say so away I go again... for another couple of silent months here I'm sure. :p Xilmin visited the elves at 06:25 p.m. |
Basics Name: Xilmin Nerrar (might as well be when I'm on the net ;) ) Favs Food: Ketchup (or anything with ketchup! [I mean anything])
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