Thursday, September 11, 2003
::blink... blink... yawn... crack... blink:: Must not go to sleep yet. Must not go to sleep yet. Well that last hour or so was fun. Playing such crap as Rocketman and Donut Boy on Shockwave.com. ::sweatdrop:: But I'm too dead for anything else. :S Stupid crap night last night. ::grumble grumble glare grumble grumble growl grumble grumble:: Argh! A dream upset me and woke me up. Nearly woke up crying, and then Akuma got out for a bit and I had a fist fight with my duvet. :S I can't be bothered going into the details of the dream. Giant babies chasing me, I can handle (well, other than just plain freaking me out anyway), but when it comes to things that could actually happen in reality, I get worked up. :S
So I haven't exactly been all that awake for college today. Drank 2 bottles of coke in an attempt to keep myself awake with the caffiene. I think it worked. Certainly I didn't collapse on the desk during class anyway. ;) Drew plenty of fun doodles in Physics again. Me getting attacked by numbers, and an illistrated idea of the 'equations of motion' (aka, letters made into the shape of a bike ::sweatdrop:: Well, it might help me remember them ;) )
As for Chemistry, I actually worked hard in class. Well, my mind did anyway. Didn't write too much. But the teacher was trying to help my mind grasp the concept of a 'mole'. I think I've got it now. It's a very large number. Then I got confused over that and 'molar' which is actually 'moles per litre' (why couldn't they just say that? It would save a whole load of confusion on my part!). It's weird really. I can fly through equations and what-not and barely have to think, but I never have a clue what I'm actually doing. Then again, I rarely ever know what I'm doing at the best of times. ;)
Didn't cycle in to college today. Decided that what with the rain chucking it down, and my legs in agony from yesterday, I'd take advantage of the fact my mum works there and got a lift. Definitely a good idea. I'd have fallen asleep on the bike if I'd tried that. :S
Oh, the song's back! This song was killing me earlier when I was playing Joust. I mean, it's bad enough playing a game where you fly around on an ostrich and battle buzzards, then grab the eggs before the men hatch and get picked up by the buzzards again! When I'm listening to a song that cracks me up at the best of times... oi oi! Ah, gotta listen again! >)
I can't stop this feeling deep inside of me
Girl, you don't realise what you do to me
When you hold me in your arms so tight
You let me know everything's alright
Aaaa-aaaa-aaaa-aaaa-aaaah
I'm hooked on a feeling
I'm high on believing that you're in love with me
Lips as sweet as candy
It's taste is on my mind
Girl, you got me thirsty for another cup of wine
Got a bug from you, girl
But I don't need no cure
I shall stay a victim if I can, for sure
Ah the good love when we're all alone
Keep it up, girl
Yeah, you turn me on
Aaaa-aaaa-aaaa-aaaa-aaaah
I'm hooked on a feeling
I'm high on believing that you're in love with me
::laughs her head off:: Ah, that's hilarious! It's great! :D
::yawns and breaks her jaw again:: I'm off to get some supper and watch an episode of something, then it's bed for me! Please please please, mind, don't give me another dream like that! Give me your weird and perverted dreams again! They're fun or... well... weird, but that's fun in it's own weird way. >) Sayonara!
Xilmin visited the elves at 09:46 p.m.
Wednesday, September 10, 2003
I'm supposed to be at Saku's in... ::checks watch:: 20 min! I'd better be quick here then!
Visited the Occupational Therapist again. She really doesn't have to do any work with me right now. She keeps saying "Ah, that's fantastic! Oh you're doing so well! I'm really impressed!", etc, etc. ::sweatdrop:: I'm at college, I'm on my bike frequently, I'm spending time with friends, I coped 'so well' with the 'traumatic' attack (which I'd forgotten about until she brought it up ::sweatdrop::), and I still have time to relax and enjoy myself with Compy. Ah, I have such a full life. ::raises eyebrows:: Something's terribly wrong with the world! ;)
But she gave some irritating news. She was speaking with the actual phsyciatrist person that was assigned to me, and apparently she's going on another holiday, and isn't going to be able to get an appointment with me about getting off these dumb anti-depressants until the end of October! ARGGGHHH!!! Talk about infuriating! I can't say I'm looking forward to the appointment itself as it is. I've got to proove that I'm happy and content with my life, without coming across as weird and perverted and... well... 'me'-like. Then I'll be put on some other type of medication. ::sweatdrop::
After the appointment, I cycled along to my old fav spot by the river next to the arch thingy. So nice there. Collapsed on the grass and just lay there for an hour or so. My mum phoned me again, wondering why I wasn't home. I really think she needs to loosen up a little when it comes to dealing with me. :S One time I opened my eyes and looked up, and there's this kestrel hovering over me. I yelled at it "I'm not your food! I'm not dead yet! Leave me be!", and it actually flew off. ::sweatdrop:: Ah, the sky was so blue, the sun was so warm, I was so comfy and I nearly fell asleep. ;) Been ages since I've been there. Felt so good! :)
Also discovered as I was cycling: I have muscles! I know that cos they hurt like hell! :S But least they're there to hurt, which makes a change. Going up hills felt easier than usual (well, until I got to the last one, but I still made it up it! :D ). I don't just feel dead after exercise, I'm in pain and dead. ;) Things are looking up! ... ::wonders if she should think about that for a bit, and decides not to bother and just enjoy the happiness of feeling slightly stronger::
Spent the rest of the afternoon sorting through music and watched an episode of Full Metal Panic Fumoffu (or whatever the second series is called). For once, I didn't watch yaoi or anything overly perverted. Just simple humour. Wow! Amazing! ;)
And so was my day... well 'afternoon' technically, since I was asleep (well, at least not awake even when I was out of bed ;) ) in the morning and it hasn't reached evening yet. But I need to go get to Saku's, so I go. Itekimasu! :)
Xilmin visited the elves at 05:13 p.m.
Tuesday, September 9, 2003
I'm a 26-year-old gay man called Timothy, apparently. :S This is news to me, but it would explain some stuff my mind comes up with! ;D
Now to go with my genki-ness today, I'm on a sugar-high and perverted-high. I surrendered to sugar cubes, among other things! >)
We made a cock-cake. Correction: Pan made a cock-cake. Li-chan and me occasionally added our own contribution. Mine was to add as much sugar as Pan would let me, plus some more. Sweet and tasty! >D Ok, the end result was one very diseased cock, but there we go. ;)
Had parents phoning every half hour trying to get me home. ::grumble grumble:: So I'd best scoot off again. Not that I'm going to sleep with a mind like it is just now ::evil grin:: I'll just go and have nice thoughts. Very nice thoughts! ::sinks in her chair, sighing happily::
Xilmin visited the elves at 11:51 p.m.
Tuesday, September 9, 2003
Killer Pacman came to eat my Physics lecturer! ... I wish... so I doodled it instead. ;) Along with an army of past exam papers and various other things. That was fun! The lesson was dull beyond belief, but I still enjoyed myself with my imagination. :)
I've been abnormally genki throughout the day. Woke up with the alarm and felt like I'd already been awake. :S My mind was still asleep and I didn't really know what I was doing, but I was still energetic. Wake up with a mind going: "Okay! Let's go! Onwards! That 'a way! ... no wait... Other way!", complete with random, over-enthusiastic gestures. Still, that's a whole load better than just rolling out of bed and collapsing on the floor in a heap and going back to sleep. :S And the great thing about being genki, I can cycle up the hill home! Weh-hey! Go me! :D
It was surprising today. I met with Li-chan, Saku and Funk at college! Wow! Plus the girl I talk to in my classes... can this be considered 'socializing'? ::shock:: ...no... No! That couldn't be true! This is me! ;) Well, it took over a week before we bumped into each other, but least I have proof they even go there now. ;)
What with being overly genki today, I've been talking to myself a bit more than usual. Certainly I noticed it more when I was cycling home. Trying to do gestures on a bike? Not a good idea. Must have seriously bewildered the passing motorists. ;) Not that I can think for the life of me what I was rambling about now... I get the feeling the topic of penguins came up for some reason... :S I just know I keep warning myself "Stop it or I'll shoot you!" But of course, it just comes back with "Someone better!" :S Also been yelling at myself "Perv!" but that's nothing new. ;) I really wanna know how much my parents hear of my own conversations with myself. Hopefully 'none of it', cos anything I say has to be bad! ::sweatdrop::
Hmmm... where'd the rest of the day go? I know I was wasting time playing Mahjong and crap mind-numbing games for a while, just cos after the cycle I was too dead to do anything else... and that's it. Just listening to techno music just now. I'm in the mood for music that ain't exactly music. The sort of music you can listen to the same track over and over and not even notice the difference. Is that really music? Ah well, I enjoy it from time to time.
::kicks downloads:: You enjoy tormenting me, don't you? ARGGGHHHH!!! How many years will it take before you finish? I demand more DN Angel, damn it! ::cough:: Ah, I'll scoot off for now. Be back whenever I'm back! Mata ne! :D
Xilmin visited the elves at 07:15 p.m.
Monday, September 8, 2003
::drags herself away from yaoi mangas:: If I get into something now, I'll never get to sleep! And I still need sleep! Wasn't as deep a sleep as I would have liked last night. Had a weird dream. :S
I was camping with my family and the hillwalking club that we always go on holidays with (at least, I think it was them. Don't remember too clearly). I remember sharks kept getting washed up on the beach. They looked really cute, even if they were dying there. Everyone was wanting to go boogie-boarding and surfing, even with all the sharks around. I forget a bit... Then in the middle of the night, I go for a wander along the beach, and there are millions of rectangular slugs, all acting like hermit crabs, in search of the perfect rectangular shell to live in. :S I started following a particularly patterned one, and kept bugging it by stealing the shells it was going after (like I would ;) ). Then I look up at the night sky, and it's perfectly black, with a pretty moon and stars... only there's this extra 'thing', then seemed like a second moon, or tiny, dim second sun. It kept changing shape. I get confused, and in that instant, this scientist guy appears and starts explaining what it is, complete with diagrams on a blackboard (that can move like it was a computer screen). I can't say I understood anything he was saying, particularly when he starts talking about the constellation of a person eating noodles. ::sweatdrop:: That's as much as I remember. There was more... but I can't remember enough for words. :S
As to what I've done today, practiced hiragana again, made several CDs, (I have space again! ;) ) had a fight with my door after it broke (I fixed it! Go me! :) ), went on a winamp skin downloading frenzy (got loads of Yami no Matsuei and DN Angel ones, as well as random cool stuff from Naruto and Slayers), and somehow ended up downloading yaoi mangas instead (I haven't a clue how I managed that one. It wasn't intentional, I swear!). Also went for a walk with the dog in Rozelle (mum dragged me out there cos I hadn't been out today. I was going to go a short cycle ride, but after the fight with the door, I was zonked for an hour or two. :S ). Was on the phone with Saku for a while as well. She's now decided to get me a rock and call it Plum so I can attach it to the top of my staff and have conversations with it. I'm happily anticipating that! ;)
::lets mind wander for a bit, then regrets it and slams head onto the desk for the zillionth time (I adore the number 'zillion'! It's so vague, yet clearly means 'a lot' ;) ):: I swear this music ain't helpin'! What is this music anyway? I know it's a soundtrack to something I don't know, but it reminds me of the sort of music that was played in parties in the 50s or something. Hee hee! Fun! :D
Bah! My concentration is terrible these days! Going to be 'interesting' to see if I can actually pay attention to the lecturers tomorrow. Just as long as I don't doodle anything 'bad' on my notes, then I'm sure they wouldn't notice. Particularly in the physics anyway. ;)
Should start getting supper and watch some anime to relax myself for sleep... like I'm gonna be doing that! Gah! Oh well! Might actually have a fun dream tonight, rather than just something plain weird! >D Ja!
Xilmin visited the elves at 09:51 p.m.
Sunday, September 7, 2003
I'm happy and hyper and as perverted as usual, but I need sleep! ::yawn... crack:: In the end, I did decide to go round to see Li-chan and Pan. Hung about watching random crap on TV. The best stuff was Jackass and Takeshi's Castle (Sakano-san was in it! :D ). Then we went up stairs and watched Scryed that I had brought with me. Eeee! Bishounen! >D Then after a fight with water, and many a "just one more episode", we finally settled down for the night. But then me and Li-chan got talking on yaoi and just generally had fun into the later early hours of the morning. ::grin:: But me so sleepy now! Not that I'm not happy for going down. ;) I'll make up for sleep tomorrow. I get to sleep in! Don't have college tomorrow! Woohoo! :D
Li-chan came round here afterwards, and we watched more Yami no Matsuei and the Gravitation OVA! ::sighs and grins happily:: Good stuff! Just can't get enough yaoi-ness! If only Yami no Matsuei got just a little bit further! ;)
Before I collapse and die completely on my desk, I think I'll go get some supper and watch Matantei Loki Ragnarok... or Onegai Twins... Oh no! How am I supposed to decide between those? ...Do I want more perversion? Oh yes! I'm watching Onegai Twins! >D Mata ne!
Xilmin visited the elves at 09:03 p.m.
Saturday, September 6, 2003
::keeps sighing happy sighs:: Love Mode is one good manga! It's hilarious! >D Oh yeah, and dramatic and all that stuff when the plot comes into it. But I'm more interested in other things. ;) Oh, so amusing! Why can't Izumi and Takamiya be in it more often! They provide the best 'amusement' for me! And Reiji and Naoya are bugging the hell outta me cos they are barely getting anywhere! Naoya still sleeps on the couch! ::grumble grumble:: But the best character, I think, is Reiji's brother, Kiichi! He's so cool! He's a doctor with a sense of humour. He don't look half bad either! Plus he does so enjoy teasing everyone. "Could you possibly be impotent?" "You two should be married! Let's go buy a ring!" ::yet another happy sigh:: Now that's the best type of humour! Even if it does tend to get him injured from Reiji. ;)
But I've read all the scanlations that were available now. ::pout:: What am I supposed to do now? Well, there is one more yaoi manga on that site. The description doesn't sound too enthralling, but I suppose it can't hurt, right? ;)
I loathe children and everything about them! Spent the afternoon with Li-chan and Pan, and 2 little brats. ::grumble grumble:: I so wanted to inflict pain on them. But I just had to make do with attacking trees instead. It seems my obsession for sticks is infectious. >) The brats picked up their own (and one made a fit when his broke, then started ranting about wanting to go to Asda... or maybe I wasn't understanding 'child-talk' properly). Li-chan broke my cool twisted sword-stick! Grrrr!!! But she helped me get a new, stronger one, so I'm not to irritated. This new one is probably still partially alive. Dumb holly tree was very determined not to give up! But I'm too stubborn to be beaten by a bush! >D
Might be going to Pan's later for the night... maybe... I'm still deciding. Late nights are not good for me. And the later I go to bed, the earlier I wake up, it seems. Doesn't make any sense, but this is me. Demo... it is fun tormenting ppl, not to mention, corrupting ppl. And I can do it so well. >D Well, if I'm gonna go, I'm gonna have to leave soon. Demo... my anime! ::glomps Compy:: Don't wanna be apart! I have more Onegai Twins! It may not be yaoi, but it's still ecchi! >D And I'll have more Matantei Loki Ragnarok soon, and that's just fun and weird! ::sigh:: Oh, what to do, what to do...
I'll leave and 'decide'. In other words, sit here for ages until I just end up watching anime upon anime or roll my way down the hill to Pan's, corrupting as I go. ;)
Xilmin visited the elves at 08:54 p.m.
Friday, September 5, 2003
Li-chan just left with happy thoughts. I'm sittin' here with happy thoughts of my own. Damn this yaoi mode of mine. Spent the day reading yaoi manga, then me and Li-chan watched several episodes of Yami no Matsuei. ::drool:: Me likey much! Speaking of which, I updated my fav anime and manga section here (for once). I'm sure I've missed several but the term 'fav' isn't specific enough these days. ;)
But I want to go watch more anime. I'm in the mood for GetBackers. Oh, please have Katsuki and Jubei! They're so cute together! Plus it's Hoshi Souichirou and Koyasu Takehito! ::happy sigh:: And if they aren't there, I'll just imagine things between Ban & Ginji instead. That's almost as good! ;) Ja! Mata ne! >D
Xilmin visited the elves at 10:48 p.m.
